How are Perfectionism and Anxiety Related?
In today’s professional world, the pursuit of perfection is often seen as a virtue. Many professionals pride themselves on their high standards and relentless drive for excellence—but this quest for perfection can cross over into perfectionism. Perfectionism is a psychological pattern where you set unrealistically high standards for yourself, followed by overly critical self-evaluations—an intense cycle that can lead to anxiety. If this sounds like someone you know (or, let’s face it—you), read on to explore the relationship between anxiety and perfectionism and how EMDR therapy can help you shift from these negative core beliefs around success, failure, and mistake.
What is Perfectionism?
Perfectionism is characterized by an all-consuming need to meet unrealistically high standards, with one's self-worth tied closely to their productivity and achievements. This characteristic can be a double-edged sword. On one hand, it drives individuals to deliver outstanding work; on the other, it can lead to feelings of inadequacy and failure when these high standards are not met. It is important to distinguish between adaptive perfectionism, which motivates individuals towards growth and improvement, and maladaptive perfectionism, which can hamper performance and lead to significant distress. The latter often stems from a combination of factors, including cultural expectations, familial pressures, and personal beliefs about success and failure. Understanding this distinction is important to cultivate a healthy work ethic.
How are Perfectionism and Anxiety Connected?
The connection between perfectionism and anxiety is a close one. Perfectionism not only fuels anxiety but also sustains it, creating a vicious cycle. People who hold themselves to unattainable standards constantly worry about making mistakes, facing criticism, or not meeting expectations. This worry manifests in symptoms of anxiety, such as restlessness, difficulty concentrating, and excessive concern over work quality, even when it meets or exceeds standard requirements. For instance, a project manager might lose sleep over the possibility of a minor error in a presentation, despite a history of successful projects. This perpetual state of anxiety not only diminishes quality of life but also impacts professional performance, leading to procrastination, avoidance of challenging tasks, and even overworking—all in the name of preventing or correcting perceived flaws.
How Does Perfectionism and Anxiety Affect Your Career?
If left unaddressed, anxiety and perfectionism can lead to burnout—a state of physical, emotional, and mental exhaustion caused by prolonged stress. Professionals consumed by perfectionism often push themselves to the brink, leading to decreased productivity and creativity. You may also inadvertently strain relationships with your colleagues, as a perfectionist's standards can become unrealistic benchmarks for the entire team.
The cognitive toll of striving for an unattainable ideal includes impaired decision-making and problem-solving skills, as the fear of making mistakes leads to over-cautiousness and indecision. Physically, the chronic stress associated with perfectionism and anxiety can manifest in symptoms such as insomnia, headaches, and gastrointestinal problems, further impacting professional performance. Thankfully, you can shift and break from patterns of perfectionism through various theraputic modalities, including but not limited to EMDR therapy, mindful self-compassion, and Acceptance and Commitment therapy (ACT).
What is EMDR?
Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) is a psychotherapy approach that helps to alleviate the distress associated with traumatic memories and negative thought patterns, including those stemming from perfectionism and anxiety. EMDR therapy is based on the premise that psychological distress is often due to unprocessed memories that continue to influence current behavior and emotional responses.
EMDR therapy focuses on past memories, present disturbances, and future actions. A key component is the use of bilateral stimulation, typically in the form of guided eye movements, to help the brain process and integrate traumatic memories, reducing their emotional impact. By facilitating the processing of these experiences, EMDR helps you experience a positive shift in beliefs about yourself.
Does EMDR work for Anxiety and Perfectionism?
If you struggle with perfectionism, EMDR therapy can help you identify and heal from experiences that contributed to your beliefs about success, failure, and self-worth. These might include early life experiences of criticism or unfairly high expectations from authority figures, which lead to an internalized pressure to be ‘perfect’.
During an EMDR session, your therapist will guide you through the process of recalling these core memories and beliefs while engaging in bilateral stimulation. As you become desensitized to these memories, you’ll begin to reprocess them into more adaptive, healthy perspectives. For example, the belief "I must be perfect to be valued" can be transformed into "I am valued for who I am, not just for my achievements."
The effectiveness of EMDR in treating anxiety and perfectionism is supported by clinical evidence and case studies. Individuals report significant reductions in anxiety symptoms, an improved ability to handle mistakes and setbacks, and a healthier perspective on personal achievement and self-worth. Importantly, EMDR does not just address the symptoms of anxiety and perfectionism, but it allows clients to tap into root causes of of these issues, offering a path towards lasting change.
How Do I Get Started with EMDR?
When seeking an EMDR therapist, it's essential to discuss your specific concerns related to perfectionism and anxiety. A good therapist will offer a safe, non-judgmental space for you to explore these issues and will work with you to develop a personalized treatment plan.
